[CSeaSee]

How about, "oh, that fish will be fine... he'll grow to the size of your tank and then stop" -or my all time favorite- "no, I can't feed that fish right now... we only feed them once a day, and that's not right now..."

[sihaya]

How about those comments that make me cringe, like... "this stuff makes corals color-up real fast." I once mumbled back "yeah and so do magic mushrooms, but you don't see me putting those in my tank." Fortunately the guy didn't hear me though. lol

[mistermikev]

A fish once said to me (from behind the glass at the LFS):
"I come here to chew spirulina and kick a$s... and we're all out of spirulina."

[dragonladylea]

I told someone at a LFS I thought I had a baby blasto or lobo as a hitchhiker, he told me couldnt be cuz they wont live in a saltwater tank!!

Same store overheard them tell someone that a Fox coral would be fine under 24w of pc lighting

[Samper]

"Would you please leave my store?"
why?
"I'm tired of you talking to my customers"
what's wrong with that?
"the only advice they need to follow is mine"
why?
"because I own this this shop"
huh....you don't quarantine, and lose half your livestock. I can count atleast ten dead or dying fish and triple that number of corals. Not only that but your displays look more like refugiums. I wouldn't buy a thing from you.
"get out"
ok

[charlie]

Do you live where I live. That conversation sounds strangely familiar to one that I have had in the past years. Wonder why I drive to Spokane to see Kevin????

[Ninong]

I once stopped by at a small LFS on the Gulf Coast just to check it out. Two of their in-wall display tanks held live rock for sale. The sign on one tank read: "Live rock, $6.99/lb" and the sign on the adjacent tank read: "Anemone rock, $7.99/lb."

The only difference was that the "anemone rock" was covered with Aiptasia.

-------------------------

I once overheard an LFS employee tell a newbie customer who asked whether the tangs in the large display tank he was standing in front of would get too big for his tank that "None of the fish we sell get bigger than 4" in our tanks." That could be a true statement if taken literally. It could mean that their fish don't live long enough to reach 4" in length or that they are sold before they reach 4" in length but I think he was implying that none of the fish they sell will grow to normal size in captivity.

-------------------------

I was standing next to a customer who asked the owner of an LFS if it would be OK to add a Flame Angel to his newly established reef tank. The owner of the store was evidently familiar with this customer's tank because he asked him how long it had been since the last damsel died during the initial cycling. The customer assured him that only two of the six damsels the store sold him three weeks previously failed to survive the initial cycle and that the last one had passed away about 10 days ago.

The LFS owner told him it would be safe to add a Flame Angelfish at this time but that it would be much better to add two of them at once since they were on sale for only $42 each.

-------------------------

I once asked an employee at an LFS in Baton Rouge why they didn't carry metal halide lamps. I was told by the employee that "metal halides will burn your corals."

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One LFS down here had a tank of captive-bred Clark's clownfish (Amphiprion clarkii) but the sign on the tank read: "Sebae Clownfish." When I pointed out to the owner of the store that they were really Clark's clownfish and not true Sebae clownfish (A. sebae), he told me I was wrong and that they were "Sebae clowns to go with the Sebae anemones in the adjacent tank."

I then explained to the LFS owner that Sebae clowns do not accept Sebae anemones (Heteractis crispa) as hosts and to prove my point I showed him the pictures of the two species of clownfish in Joyce Wilkerson's excellent book, Clownfishes, that was offered for sale (at full list) in his store. Clark's clowns have three white bars, Sebae clowns have only two. The LFS owner told me that he's been in this business for 20 years and he doesn't need to look in any stinkin' books because he knows more than the people who wrote the books.

[madamekiki]

i work in a family owned chain of 3 "pet supply stores". my expertise is not in the fishroom however. and i am quick to point that out to customers that ask me fish questions. i recently got into saltwater aquariums and have set up my first one about 2 months ago now. i found the best thing to do at work is ask all three of the guys in the fishroom the same question so i can hear all their different answers. i was told i could put a powder blue tang, a yellow tang, a hawkfish and several other fish in my tank. after doing my own research i know that is bunk. i have found that out of the three one of them gives pretty good advice on setup and equipment but the other two, i wouldn't trust their advice as far as i could throw them...and i work there. and on the rare occassions when i do help out in the fishroom and i don't have an answer to a question i sent the people straight here or to another forum that is run by a local marine and reef club. moral of the story is, never trust what you here in a fish store...ask questions and then do your own research before you buy. i can't stress that enough. i've had so many customers tell me how pretty saltwater tanks are and then ask how expensive they are to set up. and my words are usually along the lines of, they are very expensive to set up if you buy all new equipment and they are expensive to maintain....if you really are interested in setting up a saltwater aquarium take at least 6 months to research them and decide what you want to do...if after all that research you still decide you want to invest your time and money into reefkeeping, take another 6 months to research and plan the design for your aquarium. in the long run the research and planning will pay off more than a quick set up with a 25 gallon nano.

[mistermikev]

Ninong - hilarious! Once I saw a sign "Dead Liverock $6.99 lb" You figure that one out.
Samper - too funny. You keep spreading info... they'll keep spreading propaganda.(LOL) You do have to remember to gently persuade them - that way you can influence them and they don't just get offended and kick you out!
Mademakiki - there is no shame in admitting what you don't know. You aren't going to loose sales over it either. Bad info is what makes us serious hobbyists go somewhere else. Be honest and I will go out of my way to repeat buy from you!

[madamekiki]

i know this thread was meant for funny things lfs employees were heard to say but here's one from a customer today at work...

i was putting out stock and overheard a young woman talking to one of the fish guys about her fish...she said they all keep getting ich and dying but it's all her fault they get ich because she keeps picking the wrong day to do her water changes. when the fish guy asked what she meant by that she responded with, well once a month the city treats our water with ich. and i keep picking that day to do my water changes that why they all get ich. and did you know that in they treat california's water with ich too. i don't know how our fish guy finished talking to her with a straight face...i nearly peed my pants from trying not to laugh and i was an aisle over...i had to sneak to the back room so i could laugh...

so you see, it's not just the employees at lfs that say stupid things, some times it's the customers too.

[Reefland]

That one is pretty good. If they would replace the ich they add to the water with B-Ionic, it could be a good thing.

[wozza]

she said they all keep getting ich and dying but it's all her fault they get ich because she keeps picking the wrong day to do her water changes. when the fish guy asked what she meant by that she responded with, well once a month the city treats our water with ich. and i keep picking that day to do my water changes that why they all get ich. and did you know that in they treat california's water with ich too.

How people that are that dumb can survive in this world without electrocuting them selves or another stupid why of dieing is beyond belief.
i mean "the city treats the water with ICH!!!!!" WHAT THE HELL?

[morthius]

I had a guy come into the store saying all his African Ciclids died. Later into the discussion he informed me he put them into a saltwater tank. I asked him why he did that and his response was, the parameters written on the tank matched that of a Salt water system with the 8.3 ph and high temperture. Then I told him they were frshwater fish and he asked if he could keep his corals alive in that water range if he just switched to freshwater. Either the guy was testing me or just plain dumb.

[mistermikev]

wow, hearing the ich story... priceless. afa customers say dumb things... I think easily half the stupid stuff you hear is from a customer in way over their head, it's just more pathetic when it is someone who is being paid based on what they know about the livestock. my guess on the saltwater/freshwater cyclids is the guy was trying to mess w you... no one is that stupid. LOL you guys crack me up.

[tray262]

So I walk in and the first three tanks I see all the livestock is covered in ich. So I made a comment. Responce was great. "It's is not Ich, It's a skin condition........Like dandruff." So like anyone would do I left, After asking if they treat there tank with Selsen blue.

[mistermikev]

saw a customer in a lfs the other day, looking into a coral tank, "wow that is such a pretty plant" - pretty sure she didn't mean the chianobacteria growing there. then she is asking the knuckleheads that work there what she would need to buy to keep this "plant" alive. the employee said "oh these, these are saltwater plants, they just need the right amount of salt in the tank. you just get this salt over here and add it to your water and then check it with a salinity meter". I had to bite my toungue. none of my biz but hate to see the reef abused.

[mistermikev]

ps that's the sm store that sells live-dead rock... isn't it just rock at that point?

[weez1959]

Ok, I know this post is older than the hills but dang some of this stuff is priceless and I'm sure it'a all true!

I recently went to a new LFS and was looking to buy calcium and the old guy that worked there pointed me to a pail of Instant Ocean, so I told him I wasn't looking for salt, I want calcium, he said "it's the same thing"

How about this one from one of the shiftier places I VISIT. I say visit because I never buy there unless it's dry goods and only in a pinch.
On looking at a white anemone.... "ALL anemones start out white"

From the same place "never quarantine your fish or they will die"

Over heard telling another customer "French angel won't eat your corals if you buy him while he's still a baby like this one"

or:

me: your fish have ich
LFS: don't worry, it'll fall off soon

[charlie]

Makes me almost wish I could go into my local LFS!!!

[weez1959]

Were you kicked out by your LFS know it all?